Blogzarro Question #14

With all the chaos and crime in Gotham City, don’t you think everyone would move?

Posted in Blogzarro Questions, Comic Books | 5 Comments »

Caption This Comic Panel! #9

Last Winning Caption: From Mister Sinister: “I wanted a strap-on, but NOT LIKE THIS!”

Posted in Captions, Comic Books, Humor | 11 Comments »

REVIEW: Twisted ToyFare Theater 10th Anniversary Collection

Twisted ToyFare Theater’s 10th Anniversary Collection is all kinds of awesome. Okay, it’s actually one kind of awesome: superhero dolls making potty jokes. But that’s more than enough.

If you’re not familiar with Twisted ToyFare Theater, it’s a photographic comic strip starring classic Mego superhero dolls of the 1970s and the cartoon-based toys of the 1980s. The strip, which appears every month in ToyFare magazine, inspired Adult Swim’s “Robot Chicken.” In fact, many of the early writers of Twisted ToyFare Theater went on to write “Robot Chicken.”

This 10th Anniversary Collection, published by Wizard Entertainment, features the 25 best strips in Twisted ToyFare Theater history. The zaniness includes a day in the life of Wolverine, supervillain Jeopardy, a pugilistic Alan Moore, zombie Smurfs, an uber-randy Capt. Kirk, a Jewish Thing, and a Mexican Spider-Man. But that’s not all. There are character bios, commentary, a brand-new strip that parodies “Inside the Actors Studio,” and much more. I haven’t laughed this much while reading since, well, I don’t think I ever laughed this much while reading.

If you’re a fan of “Robot Chicken,” if you’re a fan of Twisted ToyFare, if you’re a fan of Spider-Man in a sombrero, if you’re a fan of laughing your ass off, find your credit card immediately and order this book. Then thank me.

Posted in Comic Books, Reviews | No Comments »

Caption This Comic Cover! #8

Last Week’s Winning Caption: From Giddy Goo: “Superboy, this is going to hurt me a lot more than it’s going to hurt you.” “Hurt me? That ain’t kryptonite you feel against your leg.”

Posted in Captions, Comic Books, Humor | 24 Comments »

Caption This Comic Cover! #7

Last Week’s Winning Caption: From HAL-9000: “This is what happens when you don’t swallow!”

Posted in Captions, Comic Books, Humor | 18 Comments »

Incredible Change-Bots Review

INCREDIBLE CHANGE-BOTS
Top Shelf Productions
Release Date: August 1, 2007
By Jeffrey Brown

“Incredible Change-Bots,” a graphic novel by writer and artist Jeffrey Brown, is a gut-busting parody/tribute to the animated Transformers series of the ’80s. Fans unhappy with Michael Bay‘s movie will probably prefer Brown’s screwball handling of the robots in disguise, who are featured more prominently in this story than their big-screen counterparts.

The story is familiar to Transformers fans. “Far away in space, there is a planet full of robots able to change from robot form to vehicle form — the Incredible Change-Bots! Leaving their war-torn planet, the Change-Bots arrive on Earth, where their battle continues.” The Autobots here are replaced with the Awesomebots, led by Big Rig, and their enemies are the Fantasticons, led by the maniacal Shootertron. They spend most of the story fighting each other over energy cubes, and skewering the Transformers legacy.

“Incredible Change-Bots” captures the true spirit and silliness of the original Transformers. It’s part parody, part nostalgic tribute. Jeffrey Brown does a great job of returning the reader to the era of the original Transformers and showing what made them so awesome and so silly. It’s a hilarious and fun look at those robots in disguise.

Posted in Comic Books, Reviews | 1 Comment »

Caption This Comic Panel #6

Last Week’s Winning Caption: From Kevin: “And that’s the Fantastic Five, bitch!”

Posted in Captions, Comic Books, Humor | 26 Comments »

Caption This Comic Panel #5

Last Week’s Winning Captions: From Blastoman: “Can you warm it with your heat vision before you start? That fortress of yours makes it feel like I have a popsicle in my ass. And dont call me your little Kryptonian pillow biter!”

From Kevin: “Damn you, Make A Wish Foundation! When I said I wanted to know superman intimately, it wasn’t — it wasn’t L-LIKE THIS.”

From Jibba-jabba: “If Batman — *sniff* — finds out about this — *sniff* — you’re screwed!”

Posted in Captions, Comic Books, Humor | 37 Comments »

Caption This Comic Panel #4

Last Week’s Winning Caption: From Randy: Red Lion: “Admit it! The world needed a Voltron movie LONG before it needed a Transformers movie!” OP: “We can work this out! I have Michael Bay’s private phone number!”

Posted in Captions, Comic Books, Humor | 25 Comments »

The Best of Blogzarro

How can a blog so terrible, so intrinsically bad, so offensive and puerile have a best-of? Well, it can. The other day a young man asked me, “Isn’t ‘The Best of Blogzarro’ kinda like a Great White greatest hits album?” After gut-punching the young man when he wasn’t looking and then arguing that even crap has differing levels of quality, I said, “Who the hell are you? And how did you know about the ‘Best of Blogzarro’ post before I even published it?” Nevertheless, I present the greatest and most popular posts of the first six months of Blogzarro’s existence. Perhaps you missed one or all of them. Now is the time to catch up. If you would like to learn more about the art of gut-punching or Blogzarro, head over to your local library (or just hit the links under the ‘categories’ section to your right).

1 | Lame Superhero of the Week: She-Thing

Wherein I discuss the pros and cons of a relationship with a rock creature. By the way, I’m all for it.

2 | Wonder Woman and the Phallic Menace

Wherein I infiltrate the secret world of phalluses and superheroines and prove that neither comes out the victor.

3 | The 20 Greatest Spider-Man Villains

Wherein I create a list that no one agrees on.

4 | The Bizarre, The Bad, The Bawdy Baseball Names

Wherein I get to write the words “rusty” and “kuntz” without referring to sex.

5 | The 10 Coolest ‘Fictional’ Trucks

Wherein I compile one of the stupidest lists of all time.

6 | Other Amusement Rides That Should Be Turned Into Movies

Wherein I prove that I have what it takes to pitch a blockbuster movie and bring laughter where there was only sadness.

7 | An Intro to Dubious Sexual Terminology

Wherein I use the word “Donkey Punch,” which results in thousands of hits from people searching Google for filthy sexual acts.

8 | Top 10 Rejected Transformers

Wherein I create my own robots in disguise and subsequently piss off a lot of Transformers fans.

9 | Lame Superhero of the Week: The Gay Ghost

Wherein I make many cheap gay jokes and at least one expensive one.

10 | Top 10 Ways George Lucas Hasn’t Sold-Out Star Wars

Wherein I take on the mighty George Lucas and prevail.

Posted in Comic Books, Humor, Movies, Television | 1 Comment »