
So Ben & Jerry’s ice cream has turned gay. And homosexuality never tasted so delicious. Well, not since that Snap, Crackle and Pop gangbang.
But gay food isn’t anything new. I long suspected Boston Kreme donuts of being queer — every time I eat one I get creamy jizz all over my face, and my attempts to marry one have been blocked by the state legislator.
Other (possibly) gay foods:
Fudge
NutRageous candy bars
Bananas
Kumquats
Swedish Meatballs
Cream Puffs
Semen
What about those footlong hotdogs?
Or no, wait- remember frankenstuffs? Total pinko grub.
What about foot-long hot dogs? I love foot-long dogs. I love to slide them dogs down my throat and taste their greasy skin. Are you saying I’m gay or something?
I have it on good evidence that the following foodstuffs should be added to the list:
Fig Rolls
Brioche
Toad in the Hole