Posted by James A. in Humor, Jokes, One-Liners, Observations
on Sep 21st, 2007 | 6 comments
- Damned if you do, damned if you don’t. Face it, you’re fucking damned.
- Never look a gift horse in the mouth after it’s eaten an Oreo cookie.
- Spare the rod, spoil a potentially interesting evening.
- Don’t bite off more than you can chew unless someone else is paying the bill.
- Don’t cry over spilt milk. Get even!
- If you can’t beat ‘em, make up vicious lies about ‘em.
- It’s better to give a shit than to take a shit.
- History repeats itself, so don’t worry if you missed it the first time.
- Judge not, lest ye be judged. Unless you’re a judge.
- Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me thrice, I’m coming to your fucking house with a baseball bat. Enough with the damn fooling already!
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Sticks and stones might break my bones but ’cause I’m a lich that don’t hurt me.
LOL
The last one is without a doubt the best.
“Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me thrice, I’m coming to your fucking house with a baseball bat. Enough with the damn fooling already!”
I live by that one! lol
lol
Actually, it’s much better to Take a Shit then to give a shit most of the time, except when you eat at Taco Bell.
“Might as well be hung for a sheep, than a lamb. But being hung like a donkey gets you ass.”