Optimus Prime is getting all the attention with the hype surrounding the “Transformers” movie. But what of those trucks that have come before and after the great Autobot leader? Blogzarro has scoured the world of movies, television, and comics to compile a list of the coolest trucks ever assembled. Here, I present another useless, idiotic list. Enjoy!
| 1 | OPTIMUS PRIME (Transformers)
Optimus isn’t just a damn truck. Aintcha heard, junior? He’s a robot in disguise. That makes Optimus Prime twice as cool as these other mere mortal trucks. How do you compete with a semi-truck equipped with a big-ass gun? Plus, he could kick any of these other guys’ tailpipes with one hand tied behind his back. However, I always thought the coolest thing about Prime was his deep, authoritative voice. But then I learned that Peter Cullen (Optimus Prime) is also the voice of Eeyore. So I can’t watch Winnie the Pooh without thinking, “Eeyore is freakin’ Optimus Prime!” Consequently, Eeyore has now become cooler than Tigger, but still not as cool as Piglet. |
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| 2 | GOLIATH (Knight Rider)
Coolness factor? Other than the fact that Goliath was driven by an evil, goateed David Hasselhoff, aka Garthe Knight? Because it doesn’t get any better than that in my book. Thousands of young fanboys in the ’80s gasped when they thought KITT was down for the count after a collision with Goliath. Plus, the Knight Rider race track was the most highly anticipated Christmas gift of my childhood and allowed me to recreate the famed collision in my own home. |
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| 3 | ROAD RAGE TANK TRUCK (Duel)
Before “Jaws,” Steven Spielberg brought terror to the highway with “Duel,” a 1971 TV movie about a businessman terrorized by a psycho in a rusty Peterbilt tank truck. This was way before anyone ever heard of the phrase “road rage” or the name Steven Spielberg. Think of “Duel” as “Jaws” on the highway. |
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| 4 | GREEN GOBLIN TRUCK (Maximum Overdrive)
Bad movie. Cool trucks. That sums up “Maximum Overdrive,” a horror movie that could have been titled “When Appliances Attack.” Despite its cheesiness, “Maximum Overdrive” gave us one of the scariest trucks known to man, a black 1977 White Western Star 4864 that hauled Happy Toyz. It also gave us the only movie directed by Stephen King. |
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| 5 | US 1 (US 1 Comic)
It’s the batcave on wheels. Ulysses Solomon Archer, the steel-headed super trucker of comic book oblivion, created the rig to hunt down the dreaded Highwayman. The 18-wheeler has a weapons console, a supercharger, oil slick release, tire-shredding shrapnel bombs, smoke screen, ejection seat, radar scope, and a tape deck. The comic was based on Tyco’s line of electric trucking toys. |
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| 6 | HIGHWAYMAN’s TRUCK (The Highwayman)
Speaking of obscurity and the Highwayman, NBC had a short-lived series in 1988 called “The Highwayman,” starring Sam “Flash Gordon” Jones as — you guessed it — the Highwayman. He was a U.S. Marshal who fought crime — natch — in a super truck, whose cabin concealed a helicopter. “The Highwayman” was created by Glen A. Larson (“Knight Rider,” “Battlestar Galactica”). |
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| 7 | CREEPER’S TRUCK (Jeepers Creepers)
The truck alone would scare the bejeezus out of you. But it’s the driver who will do you the most harm. The Creeper, a creature with bat wings that eats body parts to replace its own, terrorizes kids in his 1941 Chevy COE, which he also uses to transport his victims. The Creeper’s truck has been called the “most recognizable vehicle in horror film history,” but not by me. |
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| 8 | ULTRA MAGNUS (Transformers)
Ultra Magnus is an Autobot commander who took over for Optimus Prime after he was struck down in “Transformers: The Movie.” He strongly resembles Optimus and is almost as cool as Optimus, except he really wasn’t. Think of him as the Dick Sargent of the Transformers world. Magnus is equipped with missile launchers and transforms into a car carrier able to transport other Autobots. |
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| 9 | MACK (Cars)
Mack, voiced by John Ratzenberger, is a 1980s Superliner and a member of the Rust-eze Medicated Bumper Ointment Team. His main duty is to transport the cocky Lightning McQueen, though he’s been known to fall asleep at the wheel. |
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| 10. | SNOWMAN’S TRUCK (Smokey and the Bandit)
What’s cooler than a truck full of Coors beer? A truck full of Moon Pies. But that’s just me. Smokey and the Bandit made trucking look cool and helped to spawn a fascination with trucking that lasted about six months. Snowman (Jerry Reed) drove a Kenworth W900, while Burt Reynolds rode around in a black Trans Am fending off the fuzz. It was the second highest grossing movie of 1977, following “Star Wars.” |
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I gotta hand it to you…that is a very thorough list. But, what happened to BJ McKay’s truck??? I freakin loved that show when I was a kid and I will always remember that truck!
Personally, I don’t know how you leave out the Ice Cream Truck from the Twisted Metal video game series. I’d put it at 4, personally; can we just call it #11?
“He strongly resembles Optimus and is almost as cool as Optimus, except he really wasn’t. Think of him as the Dick Sargent of the Transformers world.”
Classic comparison!
how bout that trucking movie, Black Dog
Convoy 4TW
good list, i would have found a way to put the Knight Industries mobile operations Semi.
Green Goblin truck is definitely my fav. Great List!
Sooo…..torn……
Mack or Optimus?? My room is spinning!
Pfft! How could you forget Large Marge’s truck from Pee Wee’s Big Adventure?
What? No Pussy Wagon?
@ doggystyle69
I certainly didn’t forget Large Marge. But it isn’t her truck that’s cool. It’s Large Marge. In fact, you don’t even really see the truck.
What?! No Porkchop Express? for shame…
DUEL Truck was quite possibly one of the best on the list!
The truck from Mad Max totally belongs on this list.
http://www.madmaxmovies.com/cars/madmax2/Mack/TruckAttackFilming.jpg
And maybe even Humongous’ vehicle with the two guys tied to the front.
How could you leave out the main truck of the Road Warrior, the tanker that Max drove?
Yah, Mack from “Cars” made it onto the list! Oh man, I didn’t realize the Jeepers Creepers truck was on here, that’s some scary shit.
Ummmmmm Pork Chop Express from Big Trouble in Little China > all
I would have added
THE WEAPONS TRUCK
from SPY HUNTER
What about the Mac truck in Convoy! it had a kewl hood ornament.
How could you Forget Megaweapon? And The Hawk co. Auto Cart Diesel from Over the top?
The Pork Chop Express IS the King of all Trucks!
Its hard to make a long list of cool Fictional trucks in all of modern literature. Peter Cullen not only voiced Optimus Prime and Eeyore but he also supplied the voice for Goliath.
Who can forget the Transformers knockoffs the Go Bots and the truck Staks. http://www.toyarchive.com/Gobots/SuperGobots/Staks.html I think that this is the truck Michael Bay had in mind when he changed Optimus Prime into a conventional cab from a cab over. I had this toy when I was growing up and it rocked, die cast parts chrome guns. I think I might still have it somewhere.
What about the truck from universal soldier?
the truck in maximum overdrive was not a western star. it was a kenworth w900.1977 model with a detroit diesel engine
jerry reed beast trucker ever.
and BJ ANS BEAR and his KENWORTH K100E AERODYNE VIT 200 of 1979
WHERE ARE??????????????
awsome site …drive a W900 KW n so Cal.saw Smokey when i was 8. own a 79 T/A , cant deal W/cab overs even though i never missed BJ & The Bear…..
What about the Blue Mule from White Line Fever that Carrol Jo Hummer drove
What about the truck from thunder run I think it was a mack superliner with the biggest sleeper ive ever saw
what about the black mack frpm convoy??
What about Rubber Duck, Mack Convoy Movie?
Thorpll, just a little note, Goliath never spoke…… Peter Cullen did the voice for
KARR in Knight Rider