Blogzarro Question #10
By James A. on June 21st, 2007
Why the hell do superheroes need secret identities?
Supposedly, the secret identities protect the superheroes’ loved ones. Because, god forbid, if Lex Luthor knew that Lois Lane is really married to Superman, then she’d be in terrible danger. Oh, wait, Lois Lane is in danger in every freakin’ Superman story.
Name a superhero movie in which the superhero’s significant other wasn’t kipnapped or threatened by the villain. In “Spider-Man 2″ even poor Aunt May was almost killed by Doc Ock. So, let’s can the secret identities already.
Flash Gordon never needed a damn secret identity.



June 21st, 2007 at 2:34 am
Protecting loved ones is a valid reason to use a secret identity, but a superhero also needs to make money and support themselves through a job like everyone else. I happen to think that Superman, for example, should just get some rich guy to give him a few mil so he can be Superman around the clock. Heck, the city of Metropolis should even have a fund for that.
June 21st, 2007 at 3:23 pm
Superman doesn’t need a job to make money. He can just squeeze pieces of coal into diamonds.
June 21st, 2007 at 4:45 pm
We should distinguish three kinds of superheroes.
1. Those who have no secret identity. Martian Hunter, Dr. X, Bizarro…
2. Those who are superheroes and fake friendly co-humanship like Superman, Wonder Woman etc.
3. Those who are just Peter Parker or Bruce Wayne - homo sapiens like you and me. Or just you. Their SECRET identity is Spiderman or Superman.
Let’s keep them.
June 21st, 2007 at 4:52 pm
Zep, remember, Peter Parker doesn’t have a secret identity anymore. He went public with his identity during Civil War. Though, Aunt May took a bullet because of it.
June 21st, 2007 at 10:22 pm
Screw protecting family members, I maintain my secret identity to keep my beer safe.