Blogzarro Question #7
By James A. on May 26th, 2007
How does Hollywood think we lost the Vietnam War (or Conflict, if you insist), if we had Arnold Schwarzenneger (Commando), Chuck Norris (Missing in Action), and Sylvester Stallone (Rambo) fighting on our side?
Each one of those guys could defeat an army of Vietcong by himself — though, interestingly, they did their silver-screen ass-whupping after the conflict. Where was John Matrix, John Rambo, and Col. James Braddock when the actual war was being fought? They can’t show that movie, can they?
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May 26th, 2007 at 8:47 pm
John Rambo has the power to beat all of Afghanistan, even. But, I think his strength came from being a POW. Like, maybe he wasn’t so badass before all that trauma toughened him up. That’s why by the time we get to his to see him in a movie, he’s pissed, then he’s out for blood, then for vengeance, then in space, etc.
May 26th, 2007 at 9:52 pm
That’s an interesting theory.
So, we should have fought Vietnam a second time — after our POWs got angry enough to kick some ass.
We probably should pull out of Iraq, wait a few years, gather up the angry POWs, and then go back to finally finish the job. Now, that would be a good movie…almost as good as Space Mountain the movie.
May 26th, 2007 at 10:54 pm
“I think his strength came from being a POW”
We should test this theory on McCain.
May 26th, 2007 at 11:29 pm
Maybe McCain can use that for his presidential campaign. “Vote McCain: He’s POW Strong!”
May 28th, 2007 at 5:50 pm
That would be a cool movie, but too many good characters. You would have to have one of those guys turn bad. I don’t think Hollywood has their finger on the pulse of the community or for that matter the world. If you make that movie it will probably turn out like Freddy VS. Jason. If they do anything they should make a movie like DR. Strangelove (a satire) but not on the nuclear arms race but on oil and the Middle East. And I personally prefer if it were Bruce Campbell, Tom Berenger, and Kevin Bacon intesad of the guys from Junior, Stop or My Mom will shoot, and Silent Rage.
May 29th, 2007 at 5:39 pm
Did you really have to bring up Silent Rage? Chuck has done 30 or so movies, but I try to forget about 27 of them (his best are Missing in Action 2, Delta Force, and The Hitman–I’m not counting his bad guy appearance vs. Bruce Lee). I think of those three though, Rambo and John Matrix shouldn’t be allowed to participate because of performance enhancing drugs. Chuck wasn’t on the juice for his roles.