10. Challenge Jesus to a cage match. Winner rules the earth.

9. Break Batman’s neck — come on, he’s not a superhero!

8. Freebase Kryptonite — that shit’ll fuck you up!

7. Dump Clark Kent get-up. I’m Superman 24/7 now, bitches.

6. X-ray vision. Girl’s locker room at the local high school. ‘Nuff said.

5. Beat that skinny Japanese guy at a hot dog eating contest.

4. Reverse time and stop the productions of Superman III and IV.

3. Three-way with Teri Hatcher and Kristin Kreuk. Let Krypto watch.

2. Put Margot Kidder out of her misery (you see her lately?).

1. Check tights. Discover how much steel the Man of Steel is really packing.