10. You refer to lovemaking as the “Quickening.”
9. You recited your wedding vows in the Wookiee language.
8. You’re currently wearing Aquaman Underoos.
7. Your eyesight is fine, but you wear glasses in order to hide your secret identity.
6. You wrote your will as a choose-your-own adventure.
5. Your only career ambition is to be a mild-mannered reporter.
4. You’re still working on that comic book about a lonely kid who gains super powers and exacts revenge on the bullies who once flushed his head in the school toilet.
3. Co-workers are forced to refer to you as the Commander.
2. You get into heated arguments over how Superman turned back time after he zoomed around the planet a few times at the end of the 1978 movie.
1. You still fantasize about Carrie Fisher in that slave Leia outfit from “Return of the Jedi.”
